Exceedingly accurate and incredibly true rumours about Bond25

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  • IanTIanT Posts: 573MI6 Agent
    Number 24 - honestly (a lie) I totally didn't (did) make this up.

    And I've just read somewhere on the world famous The Internet (I made this up too) that Blofeld reveals that, in addition to being Bond's foster brother, he is also having an illicit affair with Madeline Swann because, to use Blofeld's phrase in the leaked script (that I also made up) he knows it will rile dear James.

    Anyway, Bond takes off on a mission, promising to be careful and return to Madeleine. She berates him for spending too much time on "secret missions" and enters into her own "secret mission" with Blofeld. She ends up with a bun in the oven and gives birth to a child. Bond, meanwhile, tries to escape some baddies, gets shot, and his baby takes over as the next James Bond, starting a new story arc called James Bond Jnr.

    Oh I must stop drinking Vespers...
  • asioasio Melbourne, AustraliaPosts: 546MI6 Agent
    Bond's mission is to eliminate a computer programmer who has the ability to regularly finish Spider Solitaire in 85 moves.
    Drawn Out Dad.
    Independent, one-shot comic books from the outskirts of Melbourne, Australia.
    twitter.com/DrawnOutDad
  • IanTIanT Posts: 573MI6 Agent
    Hmmmm, a bit of a tricky mission that one.

    I can do it in 113 moves, am I at risk?
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    edited January 2021
    .
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • asioasio Melbourne, AustraliaPosts: 546MI6 Agent
    Fish fingers will feature prominently, in the villain's plot.

    Poison Mercury - great title.
    Drawn Out Dad.
    Independent, one-shot comic books from the outskirts of Melbourne, Australia.
    twitter.com/DrawnOutDad
  • JarvioJarvio EnglandPosts: 4,234MI6 Agent
    In the next bond film, Bond will lose his driving licence, and so just catch the bus everywhere instead. Will include fast road-chases with an angry Daniel Craig sat on the passenger seat telling the bus driver to hurry up.
    1 - LALD, 2 - AVTAK, 3 - LTK, 4 - OP, 5 - NTTD, 6 - FYEO, 7 - SF, 8 - DN, 9 - DAF, 10 - TSWLM, 11 - OHMSS, 12 - TMWTGG, 13 - GE, 14 - MR, 15 - TLD, 16 - YOLT, 17 - GF, 18 - DAD, 19 - TWINE, 20 - SP, 21 - TND, 22 - FRWL, 23 - TB, 24 - CR, 25 - QOS

    1 - Moore, 2 - Dalton, 3 - Craig, 4 - Connery, 5 - Brosnan, 6 - Lazenby
  • IanTIanT Posts: 573MI6 Agent
    The next film will be called: James Bond and the Evil Plot To Hold The World To Ransom

    Or: James Bond vs. Spectre

    Or: James Bond Returns

    Or: Risico
  • Agent KinoAgent Kino New YorkPosts: 202MI6 Agent
    I think some people are missing the wonderful satire of this topic. :))
    1. Goldfinger 2. Skyfall 3. Goldeneye 4. The Spy Who Loved Me 5. OHMSS
    Check out my Instagram: @livingthebondlife
    "I never joke about my work, 007."
  • LoeffelholzLoeffelholz The United States, With LovePosts: 8,988Quartermasters
    I've been advised to not attempt satire on these boards, as it might not be comprehended :s Which is a pity, as that well is fairly full! B-)
    Check out my Amazon author page! Mark Loeffelholz
    "I am not an entrant in the Shakespeare Stakes." - Ian Fleming
    "Screw 'em." - Daniel Craig, The Best James Bond EverTM
  • eric7064eric7064 USAPosts: 343MI6 Agent
    I heard rumors that there maybe a gun in the next film. I wasn't sure how accurate the source is. So maybe it's not true.
  • lotuslotus englandPosts: 292MI6 Agent
    It's official. Daniel Craig is going to make 4 more bond films back to back.
  • IanTIanT Posts: 573MI6 Agent
    I heard a true rumour that Disney are going to buy the rights to Bond and that Bond 25 will be an animated musical.

    In a leaked memo, Bond girls will now be known as Bond princesses.
  • always shakenalways shaken LondonPosts: 6,287MI6 Agent
    IanT wrote:
    I heard a true rumour that Disney are going to buy the rights to Bond and that Bond 25 will be an animated musical.

    In a leaked memo, Bond girls will now be known as Bond princesses.

    Disney to do Bond , cant wait to see what the ride at Hollywood studios Orlando will be like :)) :))
    By the way, did I tell you, I was "Mad"?
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 21,702MI6 Agent
    In Bondworld in Florida the ladies featured on the sign at the start of the tour will be wearing swimsuits or bikinis, but in EuroBondworld in Paris they will be stark naked :D
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 21,702MI6 Agent
    For the first time since DN, Bond will sing. In fact, musical numbers will feature in all Disney Bond movies. It is believed the song and dance numbers will play well in Asian markets, especially India.
  • PostiebearPostiebear Kent, UKPosts: 255MI6 Agent
    Breaking news, Craig has quit and everyone's loveable frog has been recruited.

    Kermit the frog has been recruited to replace bond. Miss piggy will star as piggy galore in the new film "muppets take on bond"

    Rizzo rat is Q and Michael Cain is 008.
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 21,702MI6 Agent
    edited May 2016
    The search for a topical and modern threath is ongoing. Right now the scriptwriters are developing a story idea where the villans are trying to make masses of men impotent by producing poisoned sausages. At first MI6 suspect muslim or jewish terrorists, but it turns out the villan is an extremist vegeterian billionaire. The working title is "The Sausage Threat"
    The producers promise "the biggest sausage fest ever seen on film" where "Bond must face his deepest fears".
    This looks very promising!
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 21,702MI6 Agent
    "The Sausage of Death" is another title under consideration :007)
    So is "The Sausage Conspiracy"
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    edited January 2021
    .
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • ChriscoopChriscoop Belize Posts: 10,449MI6 Agent
    Sausages are Forever.
    It was either that.....or the priesthood
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 21,702MI6 Agent
    EON is planning to shoot much of the movie in Germany.
  • BarbelBarbel ScotlandPosts: 36,053Chief of Staff
    I fear this can only be for the wurst.
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,792MI6 Agent
    edited January 2021
    .
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • chrisisallchrisisall Western Mass, USAPosts: 9,061MI6 Agent
    :)) :)) :)) :)) :))
    Dalton & Connery rule. Brozz was cool.
    #1.TLD/LTK 2.TND 3.GF 4.GE 5.DN 6.FYEO 7.FRWL 8.TMWTGG 9.TWINE 10.YOLT/QOS
  • ChriscoopChriscoop Belize Posts: 10,449MI6 Agent
    Number24 wrote:
    EON is planning to shoot much of the movie in Germany.
    "property of a frauline"
    It was either that.....or the priesthood
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 21,702MI6 Agent
    Casting is still underway, but there will be only one major Bond girl in a minor role ...
  • BarbelBarbel ScotlandPosts: 36,053Chief of Staff
    Number24 wrote:
    one major Bond girl in a minor role ...

    You mean, under 16???? :D
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 21,702MI6 Agent
    No, not that small. But since this movie will be a sausage fest, female roles will be kept to a minimum :D
  • Number24Number24 NorwayPosts: 21,702MI6 Agent
    BTW, have you noticed how movies with very few female roles also tend to save money on the wardrobe for the actresses?
    Strange this ...
  • IanTIanT Posts: 573MI6 Agent
    I've just been told that the title will be Sausagefinger


    You heard it here first!
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