Carry On Skyfall

Napoleon PluralNapoleon Plural LondonPosts: 9,027MI6 Agent
edited March 2013 in Skyfall - Bond 23 (2012)
It had to happen.

Skyfall is the first Bond film where I started to itch for the return of the Carry On team, they would have made mincemeat of it. I think it was the scene where Silva makes his entrance with a long, boring soliliquay about rats or something. You half expect Bond to say, 'Is this going to take long?'

So, without further ado, who would we cast? :)

1) Sid James as James Bond

Obvious really, though to be fair I'm not sure that ol' Sid was quite as craggy as Craig. :D

sid+james.jpg

2) Frankie Howerd as Silva

'Ooh, no, now stop it!' Known for his ratty wig, camp manner and never ending monologues, he's a shoe-in as Bond's flamboyant nemesis. Just as Howerd seemed slightly apart from the Carry On team, so Silva seems to occupy a different movie.

'Ooh, all this running around, I'm quite winded!'


titter_ye_not_frankie_howerd.jpg


3) Barbara Windsor as Eve Moneypenny

Known for the did they-didn't they supposed off camera affair with Bond, I mean Sid.

"Oooh sir, I'm awfully sorry I shot you!" Turns around, hand over nose, sniggering.
Bond: 'You stupid nit!'

18568-2990.gif

4) Jim Dale as Q

If we had a young Charles Hawtrey, he'd be the man, but instead we're going for the young bumbler on the block. 'Oops, erm, I seem to have uploaded the villain's virus onto the MI6 mainframe, Om am most terribly sorry.'

jim_dale_Carry_On.jpg

5) Joan Sims as M

"James Boggle, if you think you're taking me all the way to Scotland in that old rust bucket, with that suspension an' all, you can simply turn right round and take me back again!'

15996-3006.gif

And, the venomous:

'Where the hell have you been?'

Oh no, hang on, that was actually in the film. :#

6) Hattie Jacques as Severine

Plenty of scope for jokes like, 'Well, it was easier to hit her than the whisky, let's put it that way...' and 'Maybe I should have made it a double'. Not to mention 'I think we're going to need a bigger shower...'

7) Kenneth Williams as Mallory

The cold fish who turns out to be a decent sort, gets to say to Bond in the next film, 'Ooh, no, stop messing about!'

8) Roy Castle as Silva's henchman

Mainly because no one remembers much about him.

'Elevation's what I need, when I'm falling from a skyscraper, yeah!'

9) Terry Scott as Tanner

Highlight being his puffed up exasperation as M goes on and on and on reciting poetry during the tribunal hearing. 'Good god woman, can't you put a stop to it!'

10) Charles Hawtrey as Kircade

Not a physical match, but excels at the 'Oooh, hello, can't say I've been expecting you...' tack, not to mention the passive aggressive 'Ooh I am sorry, it seems I've sold all your guns' approach. Daft enough to wave a flashlight about on the moors.
"This is where we leave you Mr Bond."

Roger Moore 1927-2017

Comments

  • always shakenalways shaken LondonPosts: 6,287MI6 Agent
    that would be so bluddy funny
    By the way, did I tell you, I was "Mad"?
  • Sir MilesSir Miles The Wrong Side Of The WardrobePosts: 25,129Chief of Staff
    Crickey, Nap - a decent post from you :v

    You'd better go have a lie down :))

    Bloody funny though -{
    YNWA 96
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,696MI6 Agent
    :))
    Brilliant Post. NP -{
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • Charmed & DangerousCharmed & Dangerous Posts: 7,038MI6 Agent
    Napoleon, that is an inspired posting!! :))

    I'd only add Bernard Bresslaw at Patrice: "I'm sorry Sid, uhhh I mean James, uhh the hard drive's gone all floppy"

    image.jpg
    "How was your lamb?" "Skewered. One sympathises."
  • welshboy78welshboy78 Posts: 9,851MI6 Agent
    Hahahaha

    Best post ive read on here for a long time.

    I can just vision seeing that lot doing it!!!

    Man I miss them, big part of my childhood!!!!

    -{
    Instagram - bondclothes007
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,696MI6 Agent
    http://youtu.be/tflhPHD-_oQ

    Carry On Living.
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • StrangewaysStrangeways London, UKPosts: 1,431MI6 Agent
    WTF ....?

    Nap, we need to talk!

    :))
  • Napoleon PluralNapoleon Plural LondonPosts: 9,027MI6 Agent
    _45553606_spying.jpg
    "This is where we leave you Mr Bond."

    Roger Moore 1927-2017
  • BlackleiterBlackleiter Washington, DCPosts: 5,604MI6 Agent
    Soon! :))
    WTF ....?

    Nap, we need to talk!

    :))
    "Felix Leiter, a brother from Langley."
  • Napoleon PluralNapoleon Plural LondonPosts: 9,027MI6 Agent

    Oh, that's great stuff, just clicked on it! Yeah, except when it says was one of the best Bond films based on a Carry On film? I mean, TLD one of the best? :p
    "This is where we leave you Mr Bond."

    Roger Moore 1927-2017
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,696MI6 Agent
    Well it is to some of us "Misty eyed " Dalton Fans. :))
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • Thunderbird 2Thunderbird 2 East of Cardiff, Wales.Posts: 2,699MI6 Agent
    Infamy, Infamy - Silva's got it infamy!

    Ooh, what an enormous gun! - You should see what I do with the radio!
    This is Thunderbird 2, how can I be of assistance?
  • Silhouette ManSilhouette Man The last refuge of a scoundrelPosts: 7,579MI6 Agent
    Contender for Post of the Year 2013. "Oh, titters!"

    Silva - "And now...The Prologue" :))
    "The tough man of the world. The Secret Agent. The man who was only a silhouette." - Ian Fleming, Moonraker (1955).
  • Charmed & DangerousCharmed & Dangerous Posts: 7,038MI6 Agent
    "Ohh England, MI6, chasing spies.... Nay, Nay and Thrice Nay!"
    "How was your lamb?" "Skewered. One sympathises."
  • British VultureBritish Vulture BackwoodsPosts: 6MI6 Agent
    I like this idea!
  • zaphod99zaphod99 Posts: 1,405MI6 Agent
    It had to happen.

    Skyfall is the first Bond film where I started to itch for the return of the Carry On team, they would have made mincemeat of it. I think it was the scene where Silva makes his entrance with a long, boring soliliquay about rats or something. You half expect Bond to say, 'Is this going to take long?'

    So, without further ado, who would we cast? :)

    1) Sid James as James Bond

    Obvious really, though to be fair I'm not sure that ol' Sid was quite as craggy as Craig. :D

    sid+james.jpg

    2) Frankie Howerd as Silva

    'Ooh, no, now stop it!' Known for his ratty wig, camp manner and never ending monologues, he's a shoe-in as Bond's flamboyant nemesis. Just as Howerd seemed slightly apart from the Carry On team, so Silva seems to occupy a different movie.

    'Ooh, all this running around, I'm quite winded!'


    titter_ye_not_frankie_howerd.jpg


    3) Barbara Windsor as Eve Moneypenny

    Known for the did they-didn't they supposed off camera affair with Bond, I mean Sid.

    "Oooh sir, I'm awfully sorry I shot you!" Turns around, hand over nose, sniggering.
    Bond: 'You stupid nit!'

    18568-2990.gif

    4) Jim Dale as Q

    If we had a young Charles Hawtrey, he'd be the man, but instead we're going for the young bumbler on the block. 'Oops, erm, I seem to have uploaded the villain's virus onto the MI6 mainframe, Om am most terribly sorry.'

    jim_dale_Carry_On.jpg

    5) Joan Sims as M

    "James Boggle, if you think you're taking me all the way to Scotland in that old rust bucket, with that suspension an' all, you can simply turn right round and take me back again!'

    15996-3006.gif

    And, the venomous:

    'Where the hell have you been?'

    Oh no, hang on, that was actually in the film. :#

    6) Hattie Jacques as Severine

    Plenty of scope for jokes like, 'Well, it was easier to hit her than the whisky, let's put it that way...' and 'Maybe I should have made it a double'. Not to mention 'I think we're going to need a bigger shower...'

    7) Kenneth Williams as Mallory

    The cold fish who turns out to be a decent sort, gets to say to Bond in the next film, 'Ooh, no, stop messing about!'

    8) Roy Castle as Silva's henchman

    Mainly because no one remembers much about him.

    'Elevation's what I need, when I'm falling from a skyscraper, yeah!'

    9) Terry Scott as Tanner

    Highlight being his puffed up exasperation as M goes on and on and on reciting poetry during the tribunal hearing. 'Good god woman, can't you put a stop to it!'

    10) Charles Hawtrey as Kircade

    Not a physical match, but excels at the 'Oooh, hello, can't say I've been expecting you...' tack, not to mention the passive aggressive 'Ooh I am sorry, it seems I've sold all your guns' approach. Daft enough to wave a flashlight about on the moors.


    I missed this until now. What a hoot! Francis Howard as Silva is truly inspired. :))
    Of that of which we cannot speak we must pass over in silence- Ludwig Wittgenstein.
  • Golrush007Golrush007 South AfricaPosts: 2,909Quartermasters
    I'd certainly watch it! I love the Carry Ons, and the casting sounds great.
  • ThunderpussyThunderpussy Behind you !Posts: 63,696MI6 Agent
    I'm another big fan of the Carry Ons -{
    "I've been informed that there ARE a couple of QAnon supporters who are fairly regular posters in AJB."
  • welshguy34welshguy34 Posts: 219MI6 Agent
    Hilarious. I don't think I could watch Skyfall in the same way again. :))
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